Recently I had the privilege of housesitting for some friends for just over a week. Most of the time, I was with just one other person, so during the week I got a lot of alone time. I throughly enjoyed the stillness and quietness, and the opportunity to just rest from so many distractions. However, I began noticing that I was liking the sound of my own voice.

I enjoyed that there was no one to argue or disagree with. I liked that I could do what I wanted to when I wanted to, without having to go through a lengthy debate over the best way to do it. I liked that when I proposed an idea, it wasn’t opposed or challenged. I felt like a queen of a castle.

But I also noticed, that in my blissful bubble of zero confrontation, I was becoming increasingly self absorbed. In the comfort of my own wisdom, I wasn’t allowing for growth, challenge or better. I didn’t have the honour of having other people to challenge or improve my ideas.

And I was brought to this thought. That in the collective we’re at our best; we’re our most creative, most wise, most safe.

While we’re called to an intimate and personal relationship with Jesus, it’s actually in community, fellowship and family that we see Him most clearly. If we only ever had our view of Jesus, we’d miss out on the incredible things that He’s revealed to so many other people. I believe that every person we come into contact with can teach us a little more about the character of God. And I’ve learned that viewing relationships and conversations from this perspective is powerful! It equips us to love on them and value them in a whole new way!

Proverbs repeatedly states that to reject council and correction is foolish and stupid, and that allowing confrontation is actually wise. We can’t grow if there’s nothing to challenge us. To quote dad, “We don’t overcome blessings.”

So, upon pondering all this, I decided that when I got home I’d enjoy my family. I’d choose to revel in their loudness and assertiveness. That I’d champion their ideas and creativity. And I had the opportunity to exercise this immediately.

I’m sure anyone who has a big family, or who has been in our house, has noticed that the moment you walk through the door someone will be ‘debating’ some topic. Whether it’s where to put your shoes, whether you should drink from the tap, or whether walking straight to the fridge is really a good idea.

😂

The evening I got home, I was Wiped Out. I was used to having dinner and going to bed on my own schedule. So, having to wait until 9 o’clock to eat wasn’t my ideal. I fell half asleep at the table, and just laid there listening to my family’s colourful and opinionated dinnertime conversations. And I was again reminded, that it’s in the (even wonderful and outrageous) views and opinions of others that we learn and grow.

So, I want to encourage you to take a moment to choose to ENJOY the people around you. Their difficult-ness is making you a more gracious person. Their criticism of your ideas is making you more creative. Their analysing of your plans is making you safer and wiser.

And even take a moment to thank them for being so opinionated, thoughtful and caring. Value every thought they share with you as though their giving you the most valuable advice you’ll ever receive. Even if they’re just telling you that you’re doing the laundry wrong.

Relationships are so worth it.

Relationship is your purpose.

So enjoy it. And love well. Love better because of the gloriously imperfect people around you.

You weren’t made to be alone. You weren’t made to simply to comfortable; you were designed so that the people around you could daily shape you into the person you were made to be.

And everytime you hear an opinion you disagree with, see someone do something that annoys you, or get rebuked for doing something trivial, remember that you’re on your way to becoming a better person.

And maybe ask God to help you be someone who is a blessing to the people around you.

Even when you’d rather just not have anyone around you.

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Gen 2:18 “And the LORD God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”

Proverbs 12:1 “Whoever loves instruction loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid.”

Proverbs 16:2 “All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the LORD weighs the spirits.”

Proverbs 16:7 “When a man’s ways please the LORD, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him.”

Proverbs 17:1 “Better is a dry morsel with quietness, than a house full of feasting with strife.”

Proverbs 18:1-2 “A man who isolates himself seeks his own desire; he rages against all wise judgement. A fool has no delight in understanding, but in expressing his own heart.”

Proverbs 19:20 “Listen to council and receive instruction, that you might be wise in your latter days.”

Proverbs 21:23 “Whoever guards his mouth and tounge keeps his soul from troubles.”

Proverbs 29:11 “A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.”

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls. For he has no one to help him up. Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm; but how can one be warm alone? Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

Romans 12:9, 16, 18 “Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good. … Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set yout mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion. … If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.”

James 1:19-20 “So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”

Mark 11:25-26 “And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.”

Matthew 5:43-48 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.”