So often, I get frustrated at myself for not being capable, good enough or strong enough for a task or situation. I’ll crumble to pieces and turn to my friends asking for prayer. And every time, when I expect them to be as disappointed in me as I am, they’re thankful for the opportunity to be there for me. It’s like they count loving me, praying for me, helping me, and walking alongside me a privilege.

I think I often expect people to only want to be around me when I’m at my best. And sure, it’s probably more fun for them (and for me) when I am, but I’ve found being vulnerable and honest with my friends in all my states of being does 2 things.

Firstly, it opens up an opportunity to grow in friendship. True, deep friendship never came from doing the easy things together. Having a running buddy, classmate, or friend that you do a hobby or thing you love with is fun, but that friendship will never become anything strong or eternal if it stays at that level. True friendship is spawned out of going through significant life events together. Life events in which both parties are honest about the process. The change, the hurt, the joys, the high and the lows. Someone who you walked through depression with or who was faithfully present in your change of season. It doesn’t always have to be an intense experience that creates bonds, it can just be in showing up when they’re sick or calling them when they need to talk.

And secondly, it helps both people know that they’re not alone. They’re not alone in their weaknesses, joys, loves or struggles. 1 Corinthians 10:13 says, “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind.” Every time I read that, I remember that there is nothing that I ever struggle with that I’m ever alone in. Ever. There will always be someone (maybe not everyone, but someone) who can relate and will be able to help me through. There’s no path that I’ve walked that has never been walked before. “There’s nothing new under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 1:9) tells me that what I’m walking has been walked before and that there’s not only a “way of escape” but also a way to thrive in it. God works all things “for the good of those who love Him” (Romans 8:28), so every single thing we ever go through is an opportunity for Jesus to use it for His glory and turn it to victory in our lives. And more than that: victory in the lives of those around us. I’ve found that honesty in my struggles and victories encourages and empowers others in theirs. Nothing is ever wasted.

Pretty much every one of my anthems this year have come from conversations with friends in which they’ve spoken into my heart and situation the way only they could because they saw what I was feeling and going through from the perspective of things that they had gone through. The chorus of each of those anthems is that Jesus is our hope.

Hope’s a funny thing. It’s why we live and breathe, but there wouldn’t be any need for it if we never struggled. It’s almost like struggling is a gift that enables us to attain hope.

I get lost for words when I think of reasons why I’m thankful for the people God’s put in my life, but I know that even in that God’s greater. He’s the greatest friend. The highest lover. He’s the one who puts friendships in our lives and can take them out of our lives at any time He pleases. And it’ll all be a part of His glorious story that He’s been writing since the beginning of time. We only see a moment in this story, so it makes a lot of sense to trust the Author’s storyline. (‘i get overwhelmed sometimes’ – Abbie Gamboa)

So, I think what I’m saying is to not be discouraged in your failings or insufficiencies, because Jesus is enough for them and they’re an opportunity to deepen friendships through the realisation that we’re never, ever alone.

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” Proverbs 17:17

“My grace is sufficient for you; my strength is made perfect in your weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9